Predators v. Assholes: Fluid Masks

Some folks have likely been the victim of one or perhaps both of these types of individuals.

Often, we have a tendency to link the two treacherous personas together as one.

Predators and assholes do indeed share many of the same characteristics, however, there is a critical, distinct contrast.

A predator is typically defined as a person who continually and deliberately sets out to hurt and destroy people making their victims live in total fear of them, an almost serial aspect

Whereas, an asshole may do some similar predatory aspects because they may have been hurt, jealous, insecure, or a whole myriad of reasons.

Unlike predators, assholes do not necessarily stalk and purposely make them live in fear.

I am not in anyway saying that my definitions of these personas are gospel as different people have their own subjective viewpoints.

There seem to be predatory assholes as there are likely asshole predators.

I feel that the intent and purpose of this particular thread for those who elect to respond is to share experiences, if any, with both types of personas, and if so, how the dilemma was resolved.

Author: Unknown

David Coates There's probably a great deal more assholes than actual predators, not that two are mutually exclusive. I also am envisioning a Venn Diagram 

You often don't hear stories about the Dominants being stalked, particularly the male ones, but it does happen, and has happened to me.

For me, it was a phrase that sounds like the narrator's voice of the guy who does the movie trailer for an upcoming thriller or suspense genre: THE RELEASE: "HAVING AN EX-SUB CAN BE MURDER!! Coming soon to a dungeon near you! Women are socialized to make men feel good, to “let him down easy”. Not to say a clear and direct “NO” but speak in hints and boost egos and let people save face. People who don’t respect the social contract (rapists, predators, assholes, pickup artists) are good at taking advantage of this. “NO” is something we have to learn. “NO” is something we have to earn.

October 22 at 1:55pm · Like

Pervert

Pervert! We need to reclaim that term 

I am a true pervert.

My definition of this word may not be the same as your definition.

From a personal standpoint, a pervert is meant to be an individual who is highly enlightened in the ways of sexual pleasures.

It is not a negative word, to me, because I strongly believe it is the highest compliment I can ever give or receive, and I believe in great sex. I do not want to be a part of nor encourage regular everyday normal sex.

It is not that I believe or think routine sexual activity is bad, I just do not like it for me, because it is not who I am or what I like.

I believe in kink, and I am a sick and demented <wickedly evil laugh> when it comes to my sexual cravings, but I strive to achieve giving and receiving the greatest orgasms I possibly could.

In my sexual existence I have learned everyone does not enjoy the same things, so I made it my goal to seek out those like-minded individuals who enjoy and shares a similar erotic mission statement, if you will.

Through this journey, I became the Dominant man I am today.
So to my fellow perverts, be proud to be the sick, twisted, depraved, nasty, sexual beings that we are.

As far as the term pervert, I own it! I wear it with immense pride.

"I am kinky, I am erotically sophisticated, I am a PERVERT!"

~Unknown~

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Obedience v. Morality: Dueling Concepts

I have seen several discussions on the concept that the union of authority dynamics being embedded in the compatibility of partners.

I agree that a relationship, regardless of nature, is indeed founded its compatibility.

Being like-minded, myself

As individuals, and very much the ideal of nurturing that individuality, wanting someone that can and does think for himself or herself, yet create a union of " like minds" in certain aspects.

I have seen the concepts voiced of " thinking alike" or taking on the thinking of their "D-type", still not losing their own individuality.

Example: "My submissive would do as "I", would do", in a situation for instance.

Now this is not uncommon in decision making, and commonly exemplified in more mundane decisions perhaps. However, I believe it can and many times becomes deeper, more aligned, and more in union. Not only because like morals and ideas were the the same initially.

I am one who believes that submission in an authority dynamic is more than merely about obedience, just as dominance is more than merely about giving commands.

I also believe that one makes a choice for himself or herself as to what they will or not do, based on their own moral compass. Regardless, we are not talking about force, nor coercion here, we are talking about cognizant and cogent thought.

Granted that there is a trust and compatibility established that comforts ones security that they would not be asked to do certain things that would be so against their morals and ideals. To me that is a "no-brainer". I would not ask her to do something illegal, nor injure another, etc.

Those are easily discarded from consideration, and the point being, our moral compatibility and trust that I would not is aligned.

The depth and type of compatibility, the ever changing of individuals over time beliefs, thinking, behaviors, even morals is dynamic, not stagnant.

So given the idea of personal and individual moral in regard to obedience, I ran across this saying today.

What are your thoughts in this regard?

Notes III

(Taken from David's Personal notes on Facebook) 

David Coates

June 20, 2013 · 

Intelligence v. Wisdom

Intelligence is often confused with wisdom. Love and respect tend to be confused with fear. Above all, there are some who confuse dominance with being domineering.

As one can see there is an extremely thin line in just about any relationship that seperates discipline, order from devolving into complete savagery and chaos.

~D

Notes II

(David's personal notes from Facebook)

David Coates

June 10, 2013 · 

The Uncensored Soul

I remember back when Kathy, my submissive soulmate, was still on earth and when we go deep in our erotic sessions. It was like she was in an altered state, detached, however still cognizant of what was happening about and around her. There were times where I actually I actually viewed her uncensored soul, silent tigress, if you will, draped in pure, unadulterated wantonness lying there just below the surface of her conscious mind, stirring occasionally.

There were many times I wanted to touch and claim that untamed minx, however, I realized Kathy was not quite ready for me to go there, at least for the time being. One particular evening when we were into a deep scene once again, I decided she was ready for both of us to confront and engage Kathy's inner beast. My submissive soulmate opened her eyes to see me with a collar and leash about her tigress that seldom stirs, but definitely provides her that internal conflict that has raged on for years. It was the "good girl v. bad girl" conflict

Kathy had managed to keep under wraps for quite awhile, but that night, she came to the realization that I could bask in her wantonness, yet, keep her in check. It was definitely an incredible, memorable evening for both of us.

There are occasions where in only their deepest, darkest fantasies, would they secretly escape to observe their uncensored souls resting, however, fitfully. For many, the beast manifests itself through those focused, but often, unfocused desires and fantasies that many are scared to demonstrate to the world at large. So many women live their lives rarely digressing from being the good person.

Even with the introduction to our particular subculture, they tend to maintain what the mainstream defines as good and wholesome. I have often stated if a person or submissive could have the courage to confront his or her uncensored soul, they could resolve the periodic battles that are waged within them and find contentment, as well as, learn more about herself.

Notes I

(David's personal notes from Facebook)

David Coates

June 15, 2013 · 

Special and Significant

In her darkest hour and deepest despair,I will always care for her. I will always be there.

Through her trials, her tribulations, her doubts, her frustrations,her confusions, her anguish, and her pain; I will always be there.

As she endures her the sadness and sorrow through the promise oftomorrow, I swear and I do dare to always be there.

If she stomps her feet and crosses her arms,scowls at me displaying her charms. I will not turn away.

I shall not blow it off, however, this one will see it through.If she blows me off with a toss of her soft, silky hair. Mumblesunder her breath and my face becomes to her a glare, I won't lookaway, blow it off, because her soft, supple ass will be laid bare

If you violate every rule your man has ever made by tossing it in his facethat she has badly misbehaved. I shall not turn away or blow it off, becauseI will turn her backside rustic red.

She needs to know her Daddy will take a stand. Step up to the challenge by taking her by the hand. I cannot and will not look away or blow it off, because he knows all too well there will always be another willing man.

Author: Unknown